PodCastle 328: The Old Woman With No Teeth
The Old Woman With No Teeth
by Patricia Russo
When The Old Woman With No Teeth decided to have children, she didn’t go about it in the usual way. Well, really, what else could you expect from The Old Woman With No Teeth? If she ever did anything the usual way, even boiling a pot of water, the world might start spinning widdershins on its axis.
“Now you just stop that. I can read perfectly well, you impudent ragger. Set down what I told you, and don’t believe all the stories you’ve heard about me.”
There are many stories about The Old Woman With No Teeth, but people should not believe all of them. The most popular one is that she wore away her teeth by chewing a tunnel to the six-sided world. Nobody knows if this story is true. Many people have looked for the passageway she is supposed to have gnawed through reality, but none of the venturers have managed to pinpoint it.
“None of the ones who’ve come back, you mean. Silly bastards.”
About the Narrators
M.K. Hobson recently decided to follow a time-honored authorial tradition and become a bitter recluse. She swore off all social media and left her website to go to seed. At the moment, she exists only as a voice on short fiction podcasts such as Podcastle and Cast of Wonders. She leavens the tedium of her vastly expanded free time with misanthropy, paranoia, and weight lifting.
Find more by M.K. Hobson
Wilson Fowlie has been reading stories out loud since the age of four, and credits any talent he has in this area to his parents, who are both excellent at reading aloud.
He started narrating stories for more than just his own family in late 2008, when he answered a call for readers on the PodCastle forum
. Since then, he has gone on to read dozens of stories for PodCastle
, all of the other Escape Artists ’casts, StarShipSofa
and other District of Wonder podcasts, Kaleidocast
, Gallery of Curiosities
, Dunesteef Audio Fiction magazine
and several others.
He does all this narrating when not at his day job as a corporate video voiceover performer in Vancouver, Canada. And if the pandemic ever ends, he hopes to get back to acting in local theatre productions.
Find more by Wilson Fowlie