PodCastle Miniature 35: Loose Drawers

by Charlie Allery.
Read by Amanda Fitzwater.

It’s not that I’m easy, y’know? I mean, I got my standards, same as everyone, and it takes more than some dime-store wrench with a cheap chrome job to loosen my drawers.

But I’m a toolbox – what am I supposed to do? These guys, they’re not NASCAR engineers with a million dollars in their pocket. They’re just regular guys, trying to earn a half-decent wage, fixing the heaps of junk that other regular guys need to get to their crummy jobs, that … well, y’know how it goes.

Rated PG. for innuendo.

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9 Responses so far »

  1. 1

    Tangaroa said,

    July 14, 2009 @ 2:06 pm

    A cute and clever story! The innuendos had me chuckling all the way through. Amanda Fitzwater’s reading was great. I’ve been a “Fitzwater Fan” since hearing her at Darker Projects and Pseudopod. 🙂

  2. 2

    scatterbrain said,

    July 14, 2009 @ 8:11 pm

    I liked the concept, but that concept didn’t feel “used” to its full extent.

  3. 3

    phignewton said,

    July 15, 2009 @ 12:52 am

    …a reject from Peewees Playhouse? Doing Doing.. umpadumpa dump!

  4. 4

    Seraph said,

    July 18, 2009 @ 6:22 pm

    Oh dear god this was terrible. The barrage of double entendres was cringe inducing – but not as much as the accent of the narrator ( and I’m FROM New Zealand as well ). At least it was short…

  5. 5

    Librarian X said,

    July 19, 2009 @ 1:06 pm

    What the hell was that? Sorry, but I hated this one. Not funny and just weird, and not in a good way.

  6. 6

    Natasha said,

    July 23, 2009 @ 9:31 pm

    Oh wow, I hated this story. Loathed it. If you want to tell a story about an inanimate object, why feel the need to gender it, and then paste all the gendered stereotypes you can think of onto it? As a woman, I have enough objectification and sexualization in everyday life- I don’t enjoy listening to someone reduce femininity to nothing but the act of being penetrated, and then go further and make the female an actual object. Cheap wordplay and adolescent humour – neither smart nor funny.

  7. 7

    Gwen said,

    August 17, 2009 @ 6:56 pm

    This is the sort of story only a man could write. A woman would know better.

  8. 8

    Mari Mitchell said,

    August 19, 2009 @ 12:10 pm

    Sorry I thought it was fun.

    Really some folks just seem to have their panties in a bunch. Take’em off and let some air in. It will do you some good.

  9. 9

    Short Stories Review Roundup: May 2014 – April 2015, Part 2 | Fyrefly's Book Blog said,

    May 6, 2015 @ 8:42 am

    […] In Loose Drawers by Charlie Allery, a tool box wants you to put your… ahem… tool into her drawers. Eh. I like my sexual innuendo to be a little more subtle, and a little less “heh heh, that’s a slutty toolbox,” thanks. Listen to it […]

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