PodCastle Miniature 22: The Kissing of Frogs

By Bruce Boston.
Read by Mur Lafferty.

The thought of kissing a frog disgusted her. Yet she knew she would never kiss a prince unless she set about the kissing of frogs. So with sovereign ambition she steeled herself to the daily horrors of amphibian osculation. She kissed wood frogs and leopard frogs. Pickerels and tree toads and bull frogs. Ancient croakers and adolescent squeakers that were nothing more than tadpoles at heart.

Rated G. Contains the pressing of lips against frogskin.

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7 Responses so far »

  1. 1

    Hyperion said,

    November 23, 2008 @ 6:53 am

    Nice little story. I enjoyed the clever wordplay and the subtle jokes. (“Four O’Clock Shadow.” hee hee)

    Not to start another ratings controversy, since I doubt any children come this way, but how could “The Kissing of Frogs” be rated G? Some of the dialogue was fairly suggestive, libidinous, even.

    Or maybe I just have amplexus on the brain.

  2. 2

    scatterbrain said,

    November 23, 2008 @ 10:42 pm

    Wolf fetishism now frog fetishism? I’m expecting jackboots and nipple-clamps in the next story…

  3. 3

    Rhonda Parrish said,

    November 23, 2008 @ 10:45 pm

    That was a great story, and so true. How often is it that once we get what we thought we wanted, we find that we were wrong?

  4. 4

    phignewton said,

    November 24, 2008 @ 6:53 pm

    … a cautionary tale, princes, if you go denying females teh love sauce they’ll go get their hot mamas off incubating with god knows whatever beasties and garden vegatables they get their hands on… that was um… the moral right? it wasnt that guys are kinda grungry and fulla cooties .. um… right? right ??!

  5. 5

    C. June Wolf said,

    November 26, 2008 @ 10:46 pm

    Brilliant! Wonderful story, meaty prose (if you’ll excuse the expression), and perfectly read. Bravo!

  6. 6

    Blaine Boy said,

    November 29, 2008 @ 6:43 pm

    Moral: (Oh and I did pay copyright to Mr. Beagle for this) Frenching frogs leads to failure of Frank’s fortuitous fun-time. Poor Frank.

  7. 7

    The Fix | From the Podosphere: November 2008 said,

    December 16, 2008 @ 9:32 pm

    […] Kress is read by me, so I’ll merely recommend it before passing on to Bruce Boston’s “The Kissing of Frogs” (read by Mur Lafferty), in which our heroine knows that if you kiss enough frogs, you’ll […]

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