By Peter S. Beagle
Read by Stephen Eley (of Escape Pod)
The Tyrannosaurus — an innocent in many ways — had never had a personal message in her life, and the notion was an exciting one. Her forearms were small and weak, compared to her immense hind legs, but she was able to grip the nondescript little animal and lift him fifteen feet up, where she held him nose to nose, his beady red-brown eyes meeting her huge yellow ones with their long slit pupils. “Be quick,” she advised him, “for I am hungry, and where there’s one of you, there’s usually a whole lot, like zucchini. What was the message you wanted to give me?”
The creature, if somewhat slow of action, atoned for this failing by thinking far faster than any dinosaur. “A large asteroid is about to crash into the earth,” it chirped brightly back at the Tyrannosaurus. “So if you happen to be nursing any unacted desires, now would be the time. To act them out, I mean,” it added, realizing that the Tyrannosaurus was blinking in puzzlement at him. “It’ll happen next Thursday.”
Rated G. Contains controversial theories on climate change and evolution. (I.e., that they exist.)
George said,
September 23, 2008 @ 9:36 am
Interesting little POV story, and I think no one could have read this better than Steve. His voice just fits this story perfectly.
Hmm said,
September 23, 2008 @ 10:11 am
There is alas no discussion thread up for this one yet on the forum, so I’ll have to say this here. Wow.
I did not care much for the first fable about moths, but I really enjoyed the quirkiness here. I think that what made this story work for me was the specificand wonderful details about dinosaurs, and the chipper way the shrew gave its news about “Absolute annihalation!”
Thanks for publishing this one.
Hmm
Heradel said,
September 23, 2008 @ 11:51 am
@Hmm
Sorry about that, it’s up now. Time Warner has an uncanny ability to have technical issues at inconvenient moments.
Brave Space Monkey said,
September 23, 2008 @ 3:57 pm
A good story to put a smile on my face with my morning coffee.
Old Man Parker said,
September 24, 2008 @ 1:23 am
Silly. However, worth it to hear Stephen Eley do a female T-rex voice.
Thetguay said,
September 24, 2008 @ 2:07 am
I’m sorry, but… As much as I love Steve, and I do, does he have to read everything Escape Artists buys? All three podcasts are filled with the sound of Eley. Just seems a little incestuous.
Rachel said,
September 24, 2008 @ 3:42 am
He’ll be reading all four fables. After that, it doesn’t look like we have him scheduled until February at the earliest.
phignewton said,
September 24, 2008 @ 11:41 am
snerk!
Schreiber said,
September 24, 2008 @ 11:51 pm
I could be wrong, but I think you mean “e.g.” they exist.
scatterbrain said,
September 25, 2008 @ 4:33 pm
Its sort of like a Saturday Night Live skecth, but sort of like literature. I think I like the warning more than the story.
Bingorage said,
September 26, 2008 @ 6:31 pm
Balderdash!
Everyone knows that theropods had a highly developed sense of calendrical theory.
Jason K said,
September 27, 2008 @ 1:42 am
This was amazing. I actually laughed out loud in the car when the shrew described what he’d evolve into.
Divya said,
September 27, 2008 @ 9:13 am
Really enjoyed this short. Would love to hear more like this one.
Absolutely hilarious.
The Fix | From the Podosphere: September 2008 said,
October 16, 2008 @ 9:45 am
[...] “The Fable of the Tyrannosaurus Rex” by Peter S. Beagle (read by Stephen Eley) is a sharp and amusing take on the extinction of the dinosaurs and the rise of mammals—but perhaps not quite as you might have imagined it. [...]
Mari Mitchell said,
August 24, 2009 @ 1:07 pm
Nice… but I am not sure if much of it will stay with me for months to come.